


Where have the dreams gone

by Ostodvandi



Series: Sylvix week 2019 [3]
Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Angst, Drabble, Fire Emblem: Three Houses Spoilers, M/M, Mentions of Dimitri, Pain, Possibly Unrequited Love, Suicide, based on their non bl ending, you know which one. the angsty one
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-14
Updated: 2019-10-14
Packaged: 2020-12-16 07:14:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 528
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21032318
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ostodvandi/pseuds/Ostodvandi
Summary: Sylvain dared to dream only once, and even that dream was torn to shreds.





	Where have the dreams gone

**Author's Note:**

> "Do you have to make everything angst. Do you have to put fraldarddyd into this." Yes. I'm sorry. Also this is not beta'ed so I'm sorry x2. I promise the next one is mildly funny. Big trigger warning for two people that want to die very badly.
> 
> Day 2 of Sylvix week, I chose the prompt Dream.

Sylvain can barely remember having any dreams for his future, even when he was a small kid. He always assumed what his fate would be: Getting married to a female noble, have those crests babies, protect the Sreng border, and live like that until the day he died. He used to daydream of dying in battle, young, ending his bloodline. Leaving a handsome corpse behind, if nothing else.

But there was a time when he dared to dream of holding Felix’s hand through the years. Of putting a ring in his finger, kissing his knuckles, and telling him he loved him like he hadn’t loved anyone. He had dreamed of waking up by his side every day, kissing his hair and lips every morning. Those were good dreams, and they had felt plausible. Possible. Probable, even, as Felix had returned his affections during the war, if only because they were the two Faerghus traitors in the Alliance army, if only because after Dimitri’s death, there was a hole in Felix’s soul Sylvain uselessly thought he could fill for the rest of their lifes. 

In retrospective, he’d been a fool, thinking he could fill out Dimitri’s space.

Thinking Felix wouldn’t just leave when the pain and the regret became unbearable.

Thinking he could convince him to stay.

And now he’s looking at him again, grabbing his wrist, looking into those empty brown eyes, that scarred, yet still handsome face, the strange-looking short blue hair. He’s not Felix Hugo Fraldarius anymore, he’s Felix, a mercenary, a wandering sword. A being that only finds emotion in killing, almost as if, ironically, Dimitri’s ghost had taken over him. 

And he knows Felix still won’t stay, like he knows his dreams never meant a thing in the first place.

‘Stay.’ But he’s still a fool, until the end of his days. ‘Please.’

Felix scoffs. ‘I have work somewhere else.’

The grip on Felix’s wrist becomes tighter, and Sylvain clenches his jaw. ‘...Kill me, then.’

Felix’s eyes finally have some emotion in them, even if it’s mockery. ‘You’re not the only one that can’t stand being alive. Deal with it by yourself.’

But he can’t. He can’t keep living like this anymore, dragging himself through a life of fighting Sreng, begging that one day something will tear his body apart and finally release him.

It’d be so much easier, so much more peaceful to just die by the hand of the man he loved. The man he dreamed to share his life with to the bitter end.

Felix brushes off his hand, and Sylvain watches him go, to never see him again.

* * *

Sylvain holds the short sword on his hand, delicately as if it could break into a thousand pieces otherwise. There’s a ribbon tied to it, the one that used to tie up Felix’s hair so long ago. So he kept it, Sylvain thinks. It makes him feel better, in a way.

So this is the time he dreamed of.

Feeling the weight of all of the life Felix took away, including his own, Sylvain twists the blade in his hand, and without a second of hesitation, buries it in his own stomach.


End file.
